EMPTY

 I never had this feeling back then.. but nOw.. on this past few mOnths,. Im struggling tO fight my emOtions.. emotions that killing me inside, finding ways to make my self happy, . maybe gOod things never seems tO last,. or is it true that this empty bliss is because of certain chemicals in our bOdy? is this reliable? hmmmm.. or may be because of the things around us that made us to feel this way,?

     Is there somethig wrong?why i have this feeling? I dont want this kind of agony.. maybe you could hurt me physically.. but please Im begging you nOt emOtionally,. yeah, I will admit,. im not that strong, I'm fragile..sensitive.. easy to get hurt.,  and maybe because of this i dont want to attach my self on the things that never seems to last., because in the end, it will end up hurting myself again.. but whats the point? i love enough to hurt.. I'd keep loving him but i can only get hurt as much.. the more i love him the more i lose myself, "There is always, and I mean ALWAYS going to be someone you just won't be able to get over... How can a person give you so much strength yet still be your only weakness, thus it breaks my heart???  Yes every moment of everyday, EVERYTHING HAS CHANGED.. I never expected it, this suddenly,. maybe the reason why i kept all our conversation is just to make sure that it was happened.. and it was all i was left with  sO i have memories to ponder.. that for once in my life.. i became happy T-T (dont cry! shit)

   " I never thought I would love someone like you.. Never in my dreams that I would meet you.. But then, as I travel in my life’s journey You walk into my life and I fall for you…" Sometimes, i regret that we became once close.. cause if that things never happened maybe i will not felt this way,. But i know that i also will not experience those times that i find myself happy just the merely thought of you..

Now,I am trying to get up. I am trying every way I can to put myself together back. I might be knocked down several times but like you said i need to be strong or be stronger..